Journey, Life, Update, Weakness, Weariness

Decompression Through Exhaustion

Heidi Benson

As I sit here in the emergency room waiting on my husband, I am trying to decompress in the quietness of this waiting room. It is not usually quiet so I am thankful God blessed me with this small reward.

I thought today was going to be a free day from going to a doctor, but unfortunately this was too much to hope for. I am praying however, that both my husband and daughter will not need one this weekend.

If they can both stay well enough to not need a doctor over the weekend then I will be able to have a two day break before taking Kiddo back on Monday morning.

This week has been a whirlwind of doctors. I am use to all the doctors my daughter has to see, but it becomes daunting and exhausting when my husband needs them too. This is when I struggle with being overwhelmed because to do one person is tough, but it is manageable. It is when they both need medical help in a week that I get overwhelmed and overloaded.

If you feel inclined to send up prayers for strength and peace for me over the weekend, I would be so appreciative. I’m tired, okay I will be honest, I am exhausted. My mood is ugly and I am lacking the compassion I need to be as a caregiver. I know my husband is mad at me, but I am overwhelmed and overloaded. Thankfully Kiddo tries to be a little more understanding, although even today was difficult for her. With this all said, if you feel inclined to say some extra prayers for me, I would appreciate it. Pray my husband gets better with his new antibiotics and pray pain, headache, migraine, and sinus infection relief for my Kiddo.

Thank you all and good night everyone.

Published by Heidi Benson

I am a wife, mom, and daughter. I served in the United States Army, went to college, received a Batchelor's Degree in Criminology, homeschooled my daughter every year from start to finish, and now I am currently a daycare teacher's aide (soon to be a two-year-old teacher coming this fall). I married my husband when he was in the United States Army so I have the unique knowledge of what it is like to be on both sides of a Military uniform. While we were stationed in Germany, my daughter, who is 24 years old now, was born and I made the difficult decision to put my career on hold to be her mom. The past 20 years have been wrought with many struggles but as a result of those struggles, this blog was created. As the years passed and the struggle kept coming, I would say, "I'm not sure why we have to go through all of this, but if we have to then it is my desire to allow my story to serve as a means of encouragement to others so all this pain isn't for nothing." The years passed and the struggles did not. However, I feel now is the time God wants me to share these stories of hardships with the hopes they provide encouragement to you if you are struggling in the same way. It is my prayer they will serve as a healing opportunity for you. I want you to know you are not alone. There are others who know where you are and what you are feeling. Cling to the hope this won't last forever and that God is standing beside you while He holds you up and dries your tears. He is showing you the way, you just need to follow Him. Big Hugs, Heidi

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